Your Opinion and You!

Your Opinion and You!

All I could think of when I was writing out the title of this was, some 70's PSA commercial that I might have seen in Sex Ed class, except it was "Your Penis and You". Like I needed any help with that; I would've known my Penis by the 8th grade...trust me.

More than ever, it's easier today to share your opinion. Places like Facebook, Twitter, Yelp and countless other ways to "review" or "critique" a service, a film, a song or even a person, are now more dominate than ever before. You get bad service, no more writing a letter to the cooperate office. See a movie, love it or hate it...share your thoughts immediately after or even during to let people know "My opinion matters". 

Is it me or has this "convenience" or "right" made people extremely negative? It's almost becoming a rare find to see someone post a positive review or not over analyze something. Maybe giving everyone a voice was a bad move...sometimes, one persons vendetta can really put a hamper on someones momentum. 

This past weekend I took the Mrs. to see Life of Pi in theaters. A movie, going into, the only interaction I'd had with, was my two kids "not being fans of the book". When I saw the trailer I was blown away by the scenery, the visuals and the amazing beauty that was on the screen I was standing in front of, literally captivated. I was skeptical yet optimistic and went in with an open mind.

Let me say this before I continue, the very, very little bit of reputation I have within the Horror community was built on sharing my opinion. I was an eager film reviewer but I had a philosophy on reviewing people's work - If I had something positive to say, I'd say it....loud and clear. People who's work I loved, I shared with everyone. People who sent me their works of art to screen, if I wasn't a fan, no one would know I even watched it. I would remain silent. My thought process was this; negativity rules the Earth, from the daily news to people's everyday life. Wouldn't it be great to share a positive? 

This weekend I witnessed a Twitter discussion between a movie reviewer and a few non-reviewers. I quickly realized that this "reviewer" believed his opinion ruled. I've heard others state "If you've never been to film school, you shouldn't review films." Another outlandish theory. 

Look, I feel pretty confident that I could review a Hamburger, even without graduating from a reputable Chef school. I've eaten my fair share of Hamburgers in my lifetime...from the tasty to the sub par, but I'm not delirious enough to think my taste-buds speak for the masses. I like my Hamburger cooked a certain way, I like certain condiments on my Burger, yet that doesn't make my way, best.

With that being said, I'm at the movies, enthralled with Life of Pi, giving my eyes an orgasm (ok, maybe I didn't fully climax, but it was close) from the beauty I'm seeing. Proving that Ang Lee was one with the camera, and more importantly proving that beauty in the eye of the beholder. I'm sure, not everyone will share my sentiments about how amazing this film was. Visually, I was nearly brought to tears...this was a first for me. I had never seen anything, besides when I laid my eyes on my children, that moved me so much. 

This is MY Opinion.

I encourage people to share their opinions..I know "It's our right!" I sometimes wish people would put more effort into raising their kids, working on themselves and being better humans than worrying about pushing their  Rights". Pick your battles people. 

Let me leave you with this - If you believe your opinion is more important than anyone else's...my advice would be to never leave the computer and enjoy your delusional trip. People have all kinds of likes, I've seen films that are downright awful, yet they capture an audience. 

Worry about those who support you, create for yourself and more importantly, spread some positive vibes...not everyone digs hate.

Powerball - How would YOU spend it?

Powerball - How would YOU spend it?

If this observation seems laced with "sore loser" or hatred to those who won last night's Powerball, it's probably just in your interpretation. I mean, how can I be mad, it was only $500 million.

Let me start by saying, I hardly ever play the lottery...I even forgot to buy tickets for last nights drawing. Trust me, I'd love to win it but it usually just slips my mind plus, when you hear the odds; "You'd have a better chance to be struck by lightning 3 times in a row" than winning, the chances seems slim. Sure, someone has to win..I get that. For years, as a kid, I watched my Dad play the same 3 numbers in the New York Lotto, sometimes winning a hundred or two but I just never felt like throwing money away...instead I would often go to the race track and bet the horses. Granted, I never won, but they looked nice.

Water cooler talk this week has been :If you win, what would you do with the money? I listen to some people, those that are much better people than me, say "Well, I'd give some to my Church and maybe start an after school program for under privileged kids". This is when I quickly realize why I have no friends, usually my response is;" I'd be greedy and buy some cars and houses". Once my selfishness beams through, this is when people start with the questions, "You won't give back?"

Ok, so maybe I'm clouded by greed..hey, don't blame me..blame Gordon Gekko. "Greed is Good" I heard for years; Wall Street was a classic film, but is Gordon Gekko what's wrong with America? Greediness is nothing new, even Caveman probably wanted to keep the fire they invented to themselves, in hopes they'd club more women and slay more dinosaurs. Am I the exception? Think about this, $500 Million dollars, sure, after taxes is, maybe $300 Million, then with the instant payout, maybe you end up with a little less than $100 Million...poor you! 

What would I really buy? The obvious is get out of debt..hell, isn't everyone in debt? Those Nascar collectible plates set a lot of people back. I'd move; like, instantly. Kim, my wife, and I have been talking about moving "off the grid" so to speak, it's a dream but $100 million would help out the cause. So, let's say we move to the middle of Montana. Then, we need ATV's and snowmobiles...hey, this is my shopping list, not yours. Also, since I always try to be prepared for the Zombie Apocalypse, the house would have a high fence and probably a moat. Maybe a draw bridge...errr, sorry, forgot we don't live in the Dark Ages (or do we?).

My congrats to those people who bought, won and can now live in my house with a moat, driving the hills of Montana on a snowmobile...you're living my life...bastards. For the rest of us, we will continue being drones, working for the man and staying a sleep while the neon signs that say "Obey" flicker in the night. Enjoy your day...losers.

New Years Resolutions already?

New Years Resolutions already?

Thanksgiving has passed, Christmas cheer is looming in the faint distance and another year is upon us. First, let's put to rest the idea of the world ending; here is a tweet  that explains my feelings on the subject:

Was asked "What you gonna do before the World ends?" My response "Block, unfriend & unfollow every asshole who thinks the world is ending."

Hopefully, that sums up my "End of the World" plans. Regardless of what the Mayans have led us to believe, my guess is the calendar guy was laid off due to down sizing because of outsourcing. Just in case, I have been Dvr'ing Doomsday Preppers...

Back to the question: New Years Resolutions. Each year, Americans fill their heads with countless "Turns of a new leaf" to better themselves from being the over-weight, lazy, cheating people they are...I'm no different. "I'm going to enroll in a gym, gonna eat better and lose these 30 pounds", that's what plans I'm already making; knowing damn well, I will cancel the gym membership by March, eat like an asshole on New Years Day and the scale will remain unaffected. We all fall for that trap. After working in a gym, is it any shock that a majority of the money they make is from people who NEVER go!! That's right, they bank on you signing up and never canceling because of the guilt...luckily, I have no shame or guilt, so I cancel.

Professionally, I have some projects I want to push forward with for 2013; I want to start a web series. My film "No Clowning Around" basically rings in the New Year, releasing on Dec. 28th, so I will be attending and entering as many Film Festivals as possible. I also have plans on a sequel for No Clowning Around, but that depends on the reaction the film gets. I would also love to write a comedy, be it a short or a feature. Then there is the "This is the year" promise I make too myself - This year I will attempt Stand Up. 

Let me explain my Stand Up philosophy - Stand Up is an art form that rests solely on the performers shoulders. It's you and a microphone vs the audience. It requires no lazy friends who all "want to help" then NEVER follow through (I know a lot of creative people who are lazy assholes that never want to leave their houses..it's sad but true).For me, it's an extension of what I do everyday. Writing, observing or even tweeting dumb thoughts that, at least, make me laugh. 

So, will this be the year for me to elevate myself or will I continue to write these blogs that are read by 31 people, between the ages of 18-46 in the North American region? What dreams do you have for the new year? You have a month left to figure it out. Good luck and walk away from this with a simple life lesson - "Watch where you walk, there is shit everywhere".

Finding a groove - Satire

Finding a Groove - Satire

Sure, just like most adults in their early 40's, like me, we remember reading Mad magazine or having their subscriptions to Cracked. Getting our dose of satirical humor long before most of us even got the jokes. Hell, I remember one of the highlights of Mad was to fold the back cover to see something funny. 

At the age of 8-13 what could I possibly relate too based on World issues or economic struggles? Seeing Mad make fun of Jimmy Carter because he liked jelly beans was funny...to an 8 year old, who also loved jelly beans.

Let's jump to 2012, I'm guessing that Mad magazine is still published. Alfred E Neuman is probably still taking jabs at the president, plus Hollywood's finest are still gracing the cover. It wasn't until just recently that I discovered my love for Satire, but it was hidden. 

Twitter has made satirical writing much more easy; given us all "open mic night", if you will. Obviously, if you just read my "Keys to Social Media Success" you can tell, I don't take the social media or myself serious. I enjoy pointing out the obvious, making fun of things and people...especially Steve Corino. Watching the news; great way to see humor in things. Just today, I see that the 1st ever recipient of a Kidney Transplant finally died at the age of 93. Now, to some this might seem like a milestone for science, to me..an opportunity for a tweet:

"1st ever successful Kidney Transplant patient finally dies at age of 93...guess it wasn't that successful"

Sure some people will roll their eyes, while others will miss the joke and even some will point out the mean. I never like to be outright mean; tweeting to celebrities awful things is the new "hip" thing. I just don't do it...or at least..often.

I also have no problem making fun of myself...a lesson I learned in Professional Wrestling. Some of the best heels in wrestling made a legacy, pointing and laughing at themselves. Look at Bobby Heenan, a classic manager, who was serious when he needed to be but was also an amazing color commentator who added quick wit and satire to make others look better. 

I am always the first to point out how awful my jokes are, how I tweet a line that gets no response or even pointing out what everyone else thinks. Last night, I tweeted:

"Ever been so proud of a tweet, sit idle, waiting for the RT's to hit...& then...Nothing?         That's what my day consists of. #Disappointment"

See, you know we have all thought "Man, I have the killer tweet...gonna kill!" We tweet it, wait and nothing. I'm not comedian..just follow me and you'll see that. I'm just a guy who read Mad magazine, thinks farts are funny and likes to point and laugh at the world. I have no idea why I wrote this today..motivation? Finding a groove? Wanting too share? No idea...just having fun I guess. Until tomorrow..follow me on Twitter @RobDimension - "I'll be here all week..order the veal."