I Hate Being Called Names

Everyone has been called a name before, right? Well, sometimes its ironic. 

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www.youtube.com/RobDimension

30 second comedy short "Surge."

I was sitting at home, alone and decided to make something. It's quick, probably a little weird, but hope you enjoy. 

This week's Dimension Chat - My Pet Monster

You remember My Pet Monster, right? The plush toy from the 80's designed for boys, that launched a made for TV movie, an animated series and an undying love for all things Monster! This week, join me as I look closer at My Pet Monster, the craze and how badly I NEED one!!

Facebook; Do's and Do Not's! Part 2

Facebook; Do's and Do Not's! 

Part 2

We are back for another weekly dose of "Social Media Etiquette. It is I, the King of Social Media, Rob Dimension who will guide you through the rights and wrongs of connecting, staying connected and not being a nuisance.  

If you are lost already, let me refer you to my past blogs about social media success:

Facebook; Do's and Do Not's! - Part 1

Keys to Being Successful in Social Media

We are now going to look at common courtesy to keep the friends you have made. You've made friends but the key is, too keep them. 

Humor - Oh boy, where do I begin with this one? Social Media is basically an "Open Mic" session for everyone who feels the need to steal a joke (Hack), add some en-lighting comment that your day would be shit without, or even show their charm by adding some sexual innuendo to your already shitty day. Not everyone is funny, yet 99% off your social media feed attempts "the funny". Most times your humor is just that...YOUR humor. Posting witty banter on people's post's, especially on their "Wall" almost always seems to be an eye roller or a sigh for the person who has to get the countless notifications from their unfunny friends. 

Rule of thumb, use your comedy on YOUR OWN WALL. If your joke is in your feed, no one can complain. I mean they can, but rightfully, they can simply click the "Unfriend" button. I never mind anyone using that option. 

Honestly, how many friends do I have on Facebook? About 3,000...by my calculations, that's about 2,995 too many. I have a very close circle of friends but I'm an attention whore so I friend everyone...hey, at least I'm honest.

Let's recount the Humor rules - No stealing jokes...this is a HUGE no-no. If you can't be funny without stealing someone else joke, then pass. You're not fooling anyone. Also, refrain from adding your unfunny 2 cents from people's walls. I know it's tempting..I know you have the perfect "that's what she said" spot...just pass on it. If someone is in your Facebook friends list is guilty of this often, first, show them my site...I need the hits, then just click "unfriend". Trust me, Facebook is a fake friendship builder anyways. 

Awful idea..don't do it!

Tagging of Photos - Holy hell, this is a BIG pet peeve of many. Ok, we met, we took a picture, you want to tag it..awesome, I like that. I enjoy seeing my picture, I'm very egotistical (although mostly, I just bitch about how fat I am). What really bothers me is being tagged in photos that A) I'm not in. B) I have nothing to do with, even though you think I'll appreciate it...trust me, I don't. And C) That is some spammy type sales gimmick, usually sneakers. I only wear Adidas Superstar shell tops (Run DMC style) so unless it's a promotion for cheap people to get me a free pair, not interested.  

The above picture is a good example of things to NOT tag people in. I don't care if you think I'm sexy, dumb, or super smart (My Mom has told me 2 of those 3). Let's use our brain people, do you really want this dumb shit on your wall? Or even worse, have to hunt through your photos to find pictures of the real you? No one appreciates this things, except old cat ladies who also enjoy enjoy dressing their cats in costumes according to season. 

I appreciate meeting people, I like to remember those times..(mostly) and seeing those pictures. I don't enjoy seeing myself tagged in photo's of CM Punk with a headline "What will WWE do now?" (I honestly don't know, don't care). I don't care where your Wrestlemania seats are, unless you bought me a ticket. No one else cares either...that's the truth.

Let's refresh Tagging Pictures on Facebook - Do NOT do it! Unless it's an actual picture of that person, don't do it. Best rule to follow.

The Birthday Wish - the Birthday wish on Facebook has become an important factor in "online friendships". It's someones Birthday and you want to wish it, awesome...I encourage you to do so. People like attention (including me) but I've seen a change in the Birthday wishes. 

If someone doesn't wish you a Happy Birthday, your world will not end. Believe it or not, some people aren't on Facebook all the time...it's almost crazy to think that someone people have lives, work or even leave their house...I know, crazy. Worry about your real life friends, get a party started and get some gifts...or sit in your room, cry and eat ice cream (that's what I do).

This brings me too the next part of the Birthday wish - The generalized "Thanks to everyone who said Happy Birthday" or even worse...the "like". If your friend takes the time to write "Happy Birthday" plus maybe "Hope you have a great day" they have clearly taken the time out of their day to express their appreciation for you. Yet, you can't acknowledge it, but to send a general "thanks"? Total dick move. People always say, "well, it's the thought that counts...no reason to say thanks", you know as well as I do, if you've spent any time on Facebook that your friends are needy. You had better say "Thanks Tom, you're swell" and maybe include a smiley face or something. Trust me, Tom will then not be pissed when you tag him in a picture of your Cat, dressed as an elf. 

The "like" - I've said this before, the like function on Facebook is the laziest form of interaction, the second is the Retweet on Twitter (yes, I do both, don't judge me). "Liking" the Birthday wish is a bit of a slap in the face. In other words, they can take the time out of their day to give you a nice gesture, writing it out, doing their homework and your response is one fkn click? Wow, some ego you have! Do the right thing, tell them - Thank you.

Let's Refresh "Happy Birthday" posts - If someone wishes you a Happy Birthday, don't be a smug, celebratory turd who is too busy opening up gifts, eating cake and enjoying your day with your family and loved ones...your Facebook friends want your damn attention too!

You're entirely welcome for this course, share with your friends, while it's free. Someday, I shall be standing in front of a classroom full of people that want to know, "How can I be popular?" Until then, follow me on Twitter RobDimension and keep checking back here for more tips that will help you survive. 

Laughing at Death

Laughing at Death

As I sit at my desk, eating my morning eggs, glancing out the window at the beauty that is today, I can't help but wonder about death. We are all going to die, in fact each day we live cuts our life one day shorter...pretty nice morning thought huh? My question to you - How do you deal with death?

Comedian and Roast Master General, Jeff Ross has a good philosophy with death. Jeff often will say "Roast in Peace" using humor to help deal with the pain. Now, Jeff obviously isn't making light of anyone's life or death, he is simply helping people cope, sometimes it's a celebration of that person's life. Trust me, I'm not a comedian, I only act like one on Twitter...just like so many others.

Now you're playing with power!

This past weekend a Professional athlete commits suicide, but more importantly kills his girl friend. I'm only using this example because, it's fresh in my mind and now.... I've seen that the "Roast in Peace" style jokes apparently have a double meaning. While so many tweeted comments about the Team, I assume, they did simply because they didn't know this person so it made it ok...but, when someone they know passes away, that person is off limits. So, your friends and loved ones are off limits but others are ok....alright, now I see how it works.

Comedy...your a twisted bitch

If you follow me on Twitter, I often will wish death, almost daily on Steve Corino, while, in return, he does the same. To some, it's mean, malicious and downright awful, while to others, who are "in on the joke" know the type of friendship we have. In all honesty, we will try to one up each other yet, in real life, we actually text and have helped each other through some of our shittiest times in life. We use laughter as a therapy tool (btw...speaking of tools, he really is one) to help change our day, maybe get over a depression issue or even just to make each other laugh.  

When dealing with death, everyone has their own method of mourning. Some look at pictures and remember the good times. Some will wear black and never re-marry or look at another man. (This is for my Wife, Kim..she better choose this way!!) Some turn to laughter. Sadly, we can not choose how others cope, or more importantly "who" will see or hear others opinions. Keep in mind, when choosing your own method, you can't make your own rules.

Comedy is not for cowards! (ok, maybe that's a lie...I'm a scared bitch) Stop Apologizing!!

Let me say this, the internet is yours, it's a power we have all grown to use for our own selfishness. For information, to stay in touch or even for some, to hate, grieve and laugh. I'm not condoning being mean or insensitive to anyone, but if you strike first...then you are left to suffer.

Need a laugh? Unfollow me on Twitter @RobDimension. Check back here every Mon-Fri as I will continue to write drivel and stuff no one cares about. Have a friend? Send them this way...I'm tired of eating alone.

Finding a groove - Satire

Finding a Groove - Satire

Sure, just like most adults in their early 40's, like me, we remember reading Mad magazine or having their subscriptions to Cracked. Getting our dose of satirical humor long before most of us even got the jokes. Hell, I remember one of the highlights of Mad was to fold the back cover to see something funny. 

At the age of 8-13 what could I possibly relate too based on World issues or economic struggles? Seeing Mad make fun of Jimmy Carter because he liked jelly beans was funny...to an 8 year old, who also loved jelly beans.

Let's jump to 2012, I'm guessing that Mad magazine is still published. Alfred E Neuman is probably still taking jabs at the president, plus Hollywood's finest are still gracing the cover. It wasn't until just recently that I discovered my love for Satire, but it was hidden. 

Twitter has made satirical writing much more easy; given us all "open mic night", if you will. Obviously, if you just read my "Keys to Social Media Success" you can tell, I don't take the social media or myself serious. I enjoy pointing out the obvious, making fun of things and people...especially Steve Corino. Watching the news; great way to see humor in things. Just today, I see that the 1st ever recipient of a Kidney Transplant finally died at the age of 93. Now, to some this might seem like a milestone for science, to me..an opportunity for a tweet:

"1st ever successful Kidney Transplant patient finally dies at age of 93...guess it wasn't that successful"

Sure some people will roll their eyes, while others will miss the joke and even some will point out the mean. I never like to be outright mean; tweeting to celebrities awful things is the new "hip" thing. I just don't do it...or at least..often.

I also have no problem making fun of myself...a lesson I learned in Professional Wrestling. Some of the best heels in wrestling made a legacy, pointing and laughing at themselves. Look at Bobby Heenan, a classic manager, who was serious when he needed to be but was also an amazing color commentator who added quick wit and satire to make others look better. 

I am always the first to point out how awful my jokes are, how I tweet a line that gets no response or even pointing out what everyone else thinks. Last night, I tweeted:

"Ever been so proud of a tweet, sit idle, waiting for the RT's to hit...& then...Nothing?         That's what my day consists of. #Disappointment"

See, you know we have all thought "Man, I have the killer tweet...gonna kill!" We tweet it, wait and nothing. I'm not comedian..just follow me and you'll see that. I'm just a guy who read Mad magazine, thinks farts are funny and likes to point and laugh at the world. I have no idea why I wrote this today..motivation? Finding a groove? Wanting too share? No idea...just having fun I guess. Until tomorrow..follow me on Twitter @RobDimension - "I'll be here all week..order the veal."

Street Fighter - The Later Years

Street Fighter the Later Years…Sonic Prunes

A legacy of video games that shaped the arcade world from a dying out culture to that of a one on one battle of game play that would spawn other video games to follow suit. As well the legacy of Street Fighter spawned multiple video game sequels, comic books, cartoons and even a feature film. I remember playing street fighter in the arcade shop till my fingers bled and reciting the words and phrases such as “Sonic Boom” “Tiger Uppercut” & “Yoga Flame” to my friends in many conversations.

Now we all age, except those fortunate enough to have fountain the fountain of youth located in the Florida everglades…which will be another topic for another time. So as I said, we all age, we all get old and at some point we won’t be as “agile” as we once used to be. So should it be any different that our favorite characters of long ago should not be susceptible to the same aspect of life that we face??? My vote is no for a number of reasons, one reason being that we can’t live in the past as much as we would like to and the other reason that it is comedy gold. That’s right, watching our heroes/legend of long ago grow old and fumble about life is pure comedy, except in the case of Steven Segal running around as a make believe cop…now that was just plain sad, there’s a reason why they didn’t want him in The Expendables.

Ok, back to my point to old people, heroes and comic gold…I stumbled across a website about a year ago called CollegeHumor.com and it’s basically a sketch comedy website. If you have never been there to check out their stuff or you have only seen a couple of vides from them I highly recommend you go there or go back and look at everything they have to offer. They have a number of sketch comedies and even a few web series, all comedic and all well filmed, edited and presented. Sometimes I like to go to the site and click around at some of the things I have seen before when I am feeling a bit down…the stuff is just that funny/entertaining.

So in my most recent of returning to the site I discovered a 9 part mini-series called “Street Fighter The Later Years”, which presents the classically famous and original Street Fighters aged and put out to Pasteur by Capcom, the creator of the video game series. You see all your favorite characters and their current life status like Dhalsim being a Taxi driver, Blanka being an electrician, Guile pushing a hot dog cart and Chun Lee as a dry cleaner. So yeah, when you look at it, it is a bit stereotypical, but it’s done in a funny way.

Its starts with Zangief and Dhalsim meeting up by accident and talking about their old times and having one last tournament. They meet up with M Bison, who is completely aged and in a wheel chair, and convince him to help them train and hold one last tournament. Oh and for the record they are not only old, but they are way out of shape, on a number of levels and in some aspects they have lost their powers and spend some time getting them back. They spend a good chunk of time trying to hunt down the other members and it comes out that Capcom has pretty much cut off any royalties to them and wants them all dead.

The story line is very solid and entertains you at every twist and turn so it makes the mini episodes seem go fast and leaves you wanting more and more. There are a few twists and turns in the sub plots and while some were obvious there was one at the end that was not and that right there was well worth watching all of the episodes. The only bad thing I can say about the overall series is that they didn’t make more than 9 of them, I wish they had made more. I would love to see what they could do with other series like Street Fighter, maybe something in the line of Mortal Kombat the Later Years.

Again though I can’t stress enough how funny it is and how much you should check it out, so what are you waiting for???

Be safe and remember that the thousand hand slap is the cheapest and easiest move to kill someone with,
John Cannon

P.S. This past EVO a guy won the whole tournament with Zangief, the worst player next to Balrog, go figure.